New Years Resolutions vs New Years Intentions
The Power of Setting Intentions Over Resolutions: A Therapist's Perspective
As the clock strikes midnight on New Year's Eve, the air is filled with an electrifying sense of hope and determination. People across the globe embrace the tradition of making New Year's resolutions, setting ambitious goals aimed at self-improvement. However, as a therapist, I often witness the pitfalls and limitations of traditional resolutions. Instead, I advocate for the practice of setting intentions—a more mindful and holistic approach to personal growth and transformation.
Understanding the Difference Between Intentions and Resolutions
As a therapist, I've witnessed the transformative and powerful impact of setting intentions versus making resolutions. Let's dive into the differences and benefits of this approach to personal growth and well-being.
Resolutions and Why They Often Fall Short
Resolutions tend to focus on rigid goals without considering the underlying motivations or the journey towards change. Resolutions are often geared towards saving money, changing one’s physical body or giving up a vice. While some of these objectives are admirable, they often lack the depth and sustainability needed for genuine personal development. Resolutions tend to be rigid, setting individuals up for feelings of failure if they're unable to strictly adhere to them. The first day you miss a workout treat yourself to a cup of Starbucks, this 'all-or-nothing' mindset kicks in and leaves you feeling like a failure. It can also lead to disappointment, decreased self-esteem, and ultimately, abandonment of the resolution altogether.
Embracing Intentions: Cultivating Meaningful Change
Intentions are like guiding principles that align with our values and aspirations. Discover how setting intentions allows for flexibility, self-compassion, and a deeper connection to personal growth. Intentions are rooted in mindfulness and self-reflection. They focus on the underlying values and guiding principles that shape our behavior and choices. Setting intentions involves cultivating a mindset that aligns with our deepest desires and aspirations. Unlike resolutions, intentions are flexible and adaptable, allowing for growth and evolution throughout the journey. So what are some of the other benefits of setting intentions as opposed to resolutions?
Focus on Personal Growth: Resolutions often center on external achievements, while intentions encourage internal growth. They prompt us to reflect on our values, beliefs, and how we interact with the world around us. Setting intentions fosters a deeper understanding of oneself and promotes self-awareness, leading to more meaningful and sustainable change.
Cultivation of Mindfulness: Intentions encourage mindfulness—paying attention on purpose and without judgement. Being mindful enables individuals to make conscious choices aligned with their intentions. Whether it's in eating habits, communication, or relationships, mindfulness allows for intentional actions that support personal growth.
Less Pressure, More Compassion: Resolutions often come with immense pressure to achieve a specific outcome. When individuals fall short, they might experience self-criticism and disappointment. Raise your hand if you’ve ever beaten yourself up for not achieving a resolution or forgetting about it by February? Intentions, however, promote self-compassion. They acknowledge that growth is a continuous journey, and setbacks are opportunities for learning and growth rather than failures.
In my therapeutic practice, I guide individuals through the process of setting intentions by encouraging self-reflection and exploration. We delve into what truly matters to them, exploring their values, aspirations, and the kind of life they envision. Identifying values is a core piece of work I do with the vast majority of my clients. Together, we craft intentions that serve as guiding principles in their lives. Often a client will repeatedly mention a value during a session and that becomes their "‘word’ for the next year.
To adopt a practice of setting intentions, I recommend a few steps:
Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on what truly matters to you, your values, and the kind of person you aspire to be.
Identify Intentions: Based on your reflections, identify intentions that resonate with your core values and aspirations.
Create Affirmations: Frame your intentions as affirmations that you can revisit daily to reinforce their significance in your life. Make sure your affirmations are already rooted in truth and something that is easy to believe.
Practice Mindfulness: Cultivate mindfulness through meditation, journaling, or other mindfulness exercises to stay present and aligned with your intentions.
Embrace Flexibility: Allow space for adaptation and growth. Be open to reassessing and adjusting your intentions as you evolve. Find the greys in situations and challenge your all-or-nothing, black or white thinking patterns.
In conclusion, while New Year's resolutions have their place in goal-setting, the practice of setting intentions offers a more holistic and sustainable approach to personal growth. Intentions guide us to live consciously, align our actions with our values, and foster a sense of purpose and fulfillment in our lives. As we settled into this new year, let us embrace the power of intentions to create meaningful and lasting change within ourselves.
As always, I encourage you to be gentle with yourself, practice self-compassion, and embrace the transformative power of setting intentions.
Wishing you a year filled with growth, mindfulness, and intentionality.